Valentines Day was a bust this year. Not because My Darling did anything wrong mind you. I was greeted when I woke up by roses, several cards and presents which I delayed opening until my Darlings break time phone call. Darling gifted me with quite the sparkler, a 160 GB hard drive for my computer and the software and hardware to transfer the contents of my laptop to the new drive. Nothing says I love you like GB. I�m not a girl who wears jewelry so buying me shiny ornaments is pretty much a waste of money. I like the diamond earrings I received on our first Christmas and hope someday to upgrade them to a larger caret but a hard drive for my computer is so much more useful to me. He got me 1 GB RAM a couple of weeks ago just because I needed it. Electronic guys are thoughtful that way. I do some graphics for fun and RAM makes such a difference.

Doesn�t sound like a bust but here�s what came next. Last week was a drop off week. That means that Darling works till 4:30 45 minutes away from home and I must be to work by 5:00. This logistical conflict is resolved by utilizing Darling�s sister�s services for the 45 min to an hour crossover of our schedules. This means on drop off weeks I don�t see my husband until I get out of work. On slow days (when I don�t close) I often get home before he is off to bed but this day, this romantic holiday it turned out that our place was the place to be. Who knew? My restaurant is frequented at night by a mostly elderly and family crowd. Not really a dinner place despite the large dinner menu. We are viewed primarily as a breakfast place and in fact serve breakfast all day. We were all surprised at how busy we were. There were six servers to handle a crowd that would have been better served by eight servers and a carry out person. I was trying to juggle phone orders, tables and folks wanting to carry out�on Valentines Day. We were busy right up to close and by the time I completed my outs and rolled my silver it was after ten (we close at nine). When I arrived home I found my Darling fast asleep, sigh, not the night I had planned. Before heading off to work I had set up my gift to him. I left a pizza, rose and cinnamon hearts in the kitchen and a cookie jar filled with the kind of outfits men get in trouble for buying as THE Valentines gift because they are most obviously for him to enjoy more that her and assorted candies I know he likes in the bedroom. Cookies and sweets for him, get it? And I arrive home to find him fast asleep. Damn! Of course we celebrated some, but neither of us had enough energy for �escapades� so we settled for every day sex and snuggled off to sleep.

The weekends are always a crap shoot. Darling had to work both days and is usually too tired when he gets home for much more than a quiet evening. We did enjoy a lovely game night (Rummikub, it�s sort of like rummy but with plastic domino like pieces and the ability to move them around and use them after they are played). We used to do that all the time but since Baby Boy came along we sort of forgot about the game night option. Sunday night I work and then we are back into the grind.

Darling had to start work early this week (4:30 am) but the upside is that he gets out at 12:30. I get to see him before I go to work. We can even have an early dinner together. But since he must rise at 3 am he is long gone into slumber by the time I get home. This week we were short handed so while the money is better the workload is heavier and we get out later. He wakes up enough to cuddle up close and whisper I love you. I will never get used to this. Not that I don�t feel worthy but because I don�t ever want to take this for granted. We work at this relationship. We fight, everyone does, no relationship is all peaches and cream and although I don�t always share the bad here suffice it to say that most of the time there is a resolution we can move forward from and the rest of the time we suck it up and make it work. I so want us to be an example of a healthy relationship for Baby Boy. This isn�t easy with a father that has touch of OCD and a BP mom. We work hard so that by the time he is truly aware of us as a couple he will see what love can sculpt.

I am busy at the moment planning out the vegetable garden I hope to maintain this summer. According to Dick Raymond (the MAN of gardening evidently) I have enough square footage to grow corn, CORN!! I�m gonna be a farmer (I need some bib overalls don�t you think?) I inherited the book from the former owner and it�s so complete I think I should be able to do this. Of course I�m a little behind in the germinating indoors schedule but I think I can make up for it by purchasing plants from a nursery when it gets warmer. It's a little more expensive than seeds but if you factor in the lack of space and the supplies I think it balances out. Next year I will be ready in February, now that I know the planting year. I can�t wait for the winter to end so I can get out there and really see what I�ve got.

Corn!!! I get to grow corn!!

I LOVE corn, and especially fresh corn. I can eat it raw. When I was a little girl I had an Aunt who lived on an actual farm. I don�t remember if there was an Uncle or if it was just her and the kids but we would go to her farm and play in the corn field. When the corn was nearing harvest you could pick the ears and enjoy them fresh the old fashioned way, soaked in a giant pot and cooked in the husk on the BBQ grill. One afternoon I pick an ear and raced into the kitchen begging my aunt to cook it for me and she suggested I eat it raw. I was appalled, raw corn, insane. She pointed out to me that we eat many vegetables raw and why should corn be any different. We husked the corn and I hesitantly took a bite. It was so crisp and sweet. To this day when I purchase my bakers dozen of corn at the city market I arrive home with 12 ears. Imagine being able to stroll out to your backyard and return with sweet white corn. I want Baby Boy to enjoy then best of what the earth has to offer instead of the tasteless mass produced fodder available in the super sized, 24 hr mega grocery store. After all, I still remember the taste of that ear of corn in my Aunts kitchen (or at least I remember the pleasure it gave me.)

It�s only 6 am right now. I couldn�t get back to sleep after my Darling�s kiss goodbye this morning. Baby Boy ate early last night and needed to top off his tummy at 4:30 so I thought I might as well take advantage of the quiet time and post. I never seem to find the time to post anymore, and when I do I feel as though I have nothing really to say or anything of interest to relate. I just don�t write anymore and I don�t know if that is permanent like drawing (I used to be a decent artist but it went away) or singing (lost interest) or if I�m simply preoccupied and will return to it when life allows (or mental health demands). I suppose we shall see on that count.

Let me ask you this�

Why must Baby Boy bonk his head on every surface of my home? I expect him to place everything he gets his hands on in his mouth but nobody warned me about the head bonking. Sometimes he cries but often I hear a thunk and there on his head a read mark testifies to the bonking but he simply smiles at me. Well I suppose if he is to be a dare devil like his Dad he should get used to bonking early on.

Darling takes the best pictures sometimes, check out these.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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