Well, Done with the three day work blitz. Had an opportunity to work 10 hours on Tuesday. Monday was a fairly normal eight (well used to be normal, after the past few weeks of limited hours it was a refreshing change). Wednesday was short shift made a bit shorter because I traded out times with another woman so I could look at a house. Ahhh, so much promise. I hot tub in a terrarium (that's right an actual terrarium), basement with floor to ceiling bookshelves and a (sighs longingly) a library ladder on wheels. It even had an in-law apartment upstairs. My Darling was enthralled by the fact that it bordered on state land with nary a neighbor in sight. It was across from a high school but the swathe of trees blocked the school almost entirely, in winter, so summer would completely obscure the view and muffle the sounds of youth. But, of course you guessed it wasn't suitable. Oh the upstairs was gorgeous but the downstairs was small. The hot tub terrarium was off the master so we couldn't even take the upstairs and give the folks the master because it would limit the hot tub time to when the folks were out of the room (no soaking away a night of waiting when I got home from work). So we keep on looking.

Today is a day off. Of course after three days of not being here the place is a bit of a shambles. Most times My Darling is pretty good about keeping things tidy when I am working but he has been particularly tired of late and I think he just hasn't had it in him to do much more than put dinner on the table for himself and the kid. He gets to bundle the kid off to bed too. Of course we trained the kid with whip and chair when he was young, no giving in, ever, to begging whining or pleas for "just one more book" or "one more glass of water". The routine was strict and well, routine. So bedtime is fairly orderly here. The kid does try to, and often succeed in staying awake until Mommy gets home from work so he can get hugs and kisses from Mommy before he goes to sleep. He has made me promise that I will always kiss him good night even if he is asleep when I get home.

He knows, my son, that my promises are solid. I avoid making promises I can not keep and I move heaven and earth to keep the promises I make. I am trying to teach him the a promise is a big deal and shouldn't be made lightly. He has tried to extract promises from me from time to time that I have had to deny him because I was sure I could deliver (or I was absolutely sure I could not) and has learned that I do not make promises lightly. My Darling supports this and does the same. I will have to warn him that not all people are like that though. Some people he meets will promise at the drop of a hat and disappoint often. He will have to learn to walk away from such people and instead surround himself with people he can trust to follow through on their promises. These are the people that will make a positive effect on his life.

Back to the condition of my house. It is not tidy at all. Oh the dishwasher is filled with clean dishes and there are only a few dirty pots in the sink but papers have piled up on the table, the floor needs washing, rugs need vacuuming and the stove, sigh, lets just say that particular chore can not wait. In the past I have lined my stove top with aluminum foil allowing for fairly easy clean up but the last time I stripped off the foil I didn't replace it so the top is a bit scary right now. My Darling's family would never let the stove top get dirty, cleaning the stove top every time they use it. Perhaps that is the norm, waiting around until the top is cool after every meal and snack to whip it down, but I don't usually have the time often rush out after cooking eggs for the kid or just being to tired after a long day at work and a flurry of dinner making when I get home to spend any more time in the kitchen after dinner than I absolutely have to. From the time I get up until after dinner I rarely sit down most days. I know it is an excuse and many will call me lazy but poo to them, I do what I can and refuse to put my head down and grunt away ever moment of my life.

I don't have to answer to the world, stop judging me!

Of course the world doesn't judge me now does it, just me, so sure that everyone else is so much better at all this than I am. So I give myself a break and try and make time for writing, catching up on a few shows (made acceptable by the fact that I am folding clothes so not "sitting on the couch eating bon bons") and sometimes, blissfully indulging in a hot bath in pure tranquil silence (oh how I long for a hot tub or sauna).

There is a big basket of clothes staring me down as I write and I am listening to the sound of the washing going through the last steps of delivering more clothes to the dryer. So may other chores to do so I guess I should be done here. Glad to be back here though, I know it is good g=for me but since I can not fold clothes while I write I feel guilty about taking the time for this. Guilty or not, I will be back as soon as I can.

Take care.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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