Good and bad happening right now.

Good: I got a lab job.

Bad: It's temporary.

Good: It's a foot in the door at a local company really close to home.

Bad: It's a pay cut.

Good: It's full time so I won't lose money I just have to work longer for it.

Bad: The kid may have to drop out of preschool.

Good: They are family owned and value family life so they might accommodate me in getting the kid to preschool during my lunch.

Bad: My restaurant position may get sketchy.

Good: They want me to start right away.

Bad: They want me to start right away which means I have to find coverage at the restaurant.

Good: A future opportunity was hinted at.

Bad: No promises so no way to plan out the kids future in preK or kindergarten.

And extended family stuff still sits in limbo awaiting me to make decisions find solutions are otherwise sit down and shut up. I hate having to decide this and take responsibility but that is my option. I'm the one who is entertaining options everyone else sees no option but the status quo and I suppose that may be the truth, it just seems so very harsh and cruel. It is not our cruelness and in some ways everyone is helpless in the scenario. Only FIL holds the cards and everyone else is left with the consequences. I still feel bad and think about it all the time but really, I can't do this alone and it seems I am alone in this.

On the up side I am making progress on the little tasky things in the house that have languished. This weekend should see the bathroom finally complete. I am hoping to score a mirrored bifold door at the home store today. It's a branch of H@bitate for Hum@nity taking donations of home items like sinks, cupboards, window and of course bifold doors and selling them to raise money for the cause. Win-win for everyone. Mirrored bifolds are ridiculously expensive and I want them bad so I will troll the store until I score. Wish me luck.

Today I will finish my paperwork with the temp company and hopefully get coverage of my last few shifts.

Me and the kid are now going to look for pictures of things that start with the letters X and Y for preschool.

Still a whole lot of good.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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