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2009-04-10 - 10:30 p.m.

Wow.

The past few days have been wonderful. I have had the chance to sit in the deck of my house and chat with my friend from so far away, just as she predicted we would. I remember when I first spoke of my new home and posted pictures she spoke confidently of our meeting as though she had some crystal ball. I didn't think it could happen but today, I sat next to my friend and we talked, of our lives, our deep selves and the feelings that we both know too well.

Fear, shame, guilt...

I find it hard to face the reality that understanding a concept intellectually does not mean you will understand it emotionally.

Can't put my thoughts together on this.

We talked of the differences and the similarities between us and our countries. We learned.

I have so much in my life that I feel surprised that I seen and done. So many people in and out of my life and so many of them have left their mark on my world. I am very lucky.

Anna has given me a few days of her wonderful adventure in America. She has made my America seem exotic and anything but ordinary. I appreciate more the subtle beauty of the place where I have made my nest.

Baby Boy has some wonderful new books and a story he will hear of his friend in England.

Writing has been a challenge lately and today isn't any easier even though (or perhaps especially because) I have something enormous to share and there don't seem to be words enough to say how this affects me. So I stutter and mumble and try to find some way of sharing this moment in my life in a way that I can look back on when I am old and the idea of someone like Anna traveling half way around the world to visit me just seems like a dream I had. Too many times I have let a moment go undocumented and now I have lost so much. Even now I remember things that I have experienced and I can't believe I forgot them in the first place.

Argh.

I will not be eloquent, or smart, I can't. I will just say thank you. Thank you Anna for being my friend. Thank you to My Darling for opening our home to my friend. Thank you to everyone else who helped to make her trip possible.

I'm tired, but happy.

I wish you Peace

~alison~


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