Missed a day.

Worked yesterday and when I returned home in the afternoon the day was so beautiful I just hung outside until time to prepare dinner. After dinner we went for a walk so no time to post.

I had a chat with my boss yesterday, seems she was concerned about my "moods". Now I have been less than thrilled with the changes at work lately and when you try and address them with management you get mixed signals. The asst manager who had a problem with me yesterday acts like he is an advocate for you and encourages you to come to him with your concerns and then when you do he acts like how dare you, ungrateful sot.

We were overstaffed, again, some girls only had two tables to care for. This is ridiculous for those of us with years of experience. I spent most of my day waiting for a seating and standing around (I was joking "that's why they call it "waiting tables" cause you spend your time waiting for a table.) When I ask if that is going to be the norm and suggest I might want to go back to the night shift if that is the case he threatens to send me home, talk about an over reaction. Next, at the end of my shift, I get hauled into the office for a "chat".

In addition to suggesting I have seemed "unhappy" lately (duh) she also says she has complaints from my coworkers that I am mean and they are afraid of me. (Afraid of me? Mean? That's just crazy!) I work very hard to cultivate a good working relationship with my co-workers. I am helpful, respectful and generally try and refrain from allowing my frustration from affecting my work. I also do not use my frustration as an excuse not to do my job. Turns out the "complaints" were from one little girl who drinks on the server line (not allowed) and I told her not to in addition she was unhappy when I informed her when she got a big top (larger group) using a table from someone else's (ours) section she owes them a table. She didn't think she should give up a table. This has always been the way, I didn't make it up. It's always the lazy, rule breakers that have a problem with me. Everyone else I talked to said they were fine with me. I dutifully apologize for "scaring" the girl and she said "I accept your apology" (gee thanks). Too bad she didn't approach me instead of my boss.

I explained to my boss that my "conduct" (moodiness) as she put it was altered due to a drug reaction (true) and that I no longer take the drug and so the problem shouldn't be an issue anymore. The incident yesterday was misinterpreted and blown out of proportion by the manager involved (I was one of many unhappy with the number of girls there and he chose me on which to focus his ire.) The problem is resolved pretty much but I will need to take extra care at playing nice since they will be holding me to a higher standard then everyone else for a while.

It's true I hate my job but it is my job and I will continue to do it to the best of my ability. It's funny, I pointed out to the boss that I consistently earn 18 to 20% of my sales in tip so I must be providing excellent service (a conclusion she had to agree with) and I do more additional work around the place than any of my co-workers (also agreed to) but evidently I intimidate her and the other manager despite my attempts to go out of my way to be respectful of them.

*sigh*

I am never mean, no matter how I feel.

I am disappointed though. Now I must consider all the managers as "the enemy" even though they always try and claim they are advocates and care about you and want to know your feelings. They lie, and will use your expressed feeling against you at their first opportunity. It's sad when you can't trust your boss.

I work all day today and tomorrow (swing shift they call it). I get tired out by it but the money is good and I have Wednesday off to recoup. Oh, and there is the Tai Chi class on Wednesday. It's not perfect (the teacher is a bit of a fraud) but it is a formal setting and it's a regular outing for me.

The jogger is cleaned and ready to go, any day now.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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