The offer came and it was not enough. In fact it is a whole .89 cent an hour raise from what I am making now. Crap. I'm performing software support and they want to pay me like I'm some sort of receptionist office girl. I am going to make a counter offer but I suspect they won't meet it and I'll have to eat more crap. That's what I do you know, I eat crap. Oh and the guy who is training coordinator/software guy is evidently my ex boss all over again. Ego with feet. He had a bad week last week and decided that I had an attitude towards him (I don't have any problem with him, never did, don't know what he is talking about.) He reported that I *gasp* checked my e-mail on company time "oh my". I HATE being treated like a child everyone else has their own e-mail account but I have a generic account that everyone has access to so I can't have anyone send e-mails to it. I have to keep looking for another job I guess. They don't really want me they just want someone cheap. I was really hoping they would see that I was worth real money. I work so hard and it makes no difference.

Darlings on 12 hours 5 days a week now. I don't want to get up tomorrow, I don't want to go into work I want to stay home curled up next to my Darling, I'm tired, really tired.

I'm trying so hard to stay positive (can you see my nails gripped tightly on the edge of my reality) but I can't tread water forever, tell me the flood is receding, I want to be done with this.

goodnight

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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