I am home, safe and sound, from my Labor Day trip to my folk�s house. Due to rain the idea of sleeping out in the backyard in a tent was exchanged for �camping out� on an air mattress in my niece�s room. It was a big step for the folk�s but an uncomfortable weekend for me (not just emotionally but physically). I was sooooo happy to sleep in my own bed last night. I dutifully documented the goods I was bringing through C@n@d@ but only one inspector was interested and then only briefly scanned the list before waving us back into the US. The items I was most looking forward to bringing home were in less than fabulous condition. A few I was forced to simply dump due to their overall shabbyness. The items I inherited from my Grandmother turned out to be the W@lmart equivalent of her time leaving me to wonder if I should even bother to keep them. The Cedar chest is nice but needs work.

I was absolutely appalled at the condition of my parent�s home. It was all I could do to restrain myself from hauling out the cleaning supplies and attacking the place. If I hadn�t had a mountain of work to do digging through my stuff to weed out what I wanted from what I could live without I would have at least brought the kitchen up to code. My parents are collectors, not in the worst sense of that term but bad enough I assure you. My Mother�s biggest problem is that she can not keep up with all the mess (never could) but my Dad is a shopper/recycler which means he buys new things all the while refusing to dispose of anything that is �still good�. Should there come another ice age or some such disaster they could survive off of the foodstuff in their basement/pantry for at least a couple of months while My Darling and I would need to be breaking into the local grocery store after a couple of days. My niece and nephew appear to be accepting the standard although I escaped so there is always hope for them. I am not looking forward to mucking out the mess someday. Of course, as my Darling points out, idiot boy would most likely be more than happy to move into the place �as is� for the opportunity for yet another free meal off of my folks. The sad part is he is all they have right now.

In our quest to dispose of my unwanted items My Darling and I drove all over the town looking for a donation center only to find the charities all but pulled out of the ghost town my hometown has become. Down town was a collection of boarded up buildings and all of the neighborhoods were filled with dilapidated buildings, all dark and dingy notwithstanding the removal of the monstrous trees from my childhood. I barely recognized the streets of my youth without the trees that lovingly sheltered our play. New saplings, offering no shade or comfort, line the worn streets. Like my parents home, the town I grew up in has become old and uncared for, abandoned to the ravages of time. This once booming factory town has been reduced to an empty husk, dingy, without the vivid colors I remember. As in the movies, my flashbacks are warm and bright, no matter the discord, while the current is cold and distant despite my general happiness.

Speaking of happiness, I wasn�t all that happy this weekend. There is an emotional toll wrought when you sift through time. I could smell the past (thanks to my years of smoking) and it reeked. I can�t wait to be rid of all the smelly boxes. I shared with my Darling that I would take the next couple of weeks to go through and put everything away to which he responded, you will have this done in two days, three tops. He is probably right, especially if I can smell the stench of it when I arrive home tonight. Worse case scenario I will get it all repacked into fresh, non smelly boxes. This past is not tainted as much as my RV was with my unhappy marriage (although he did live with me for 8 months before we hit the road and all went into storage so there is the possibility of the random piece of bozorabilia in with the real memorabilia.) Speaking of bozo, My darling has pointed out that he still doesn�t know what my ex looks like. He claims to not care one way or the other about it but I imagine he has to be curious. I my struggles to remove a couple of boxes from the ridiculously crammed attic closets I found a few wedding things (including some accoutrements from the wedding ensemble), and he only asked if they were from the wedding and then let it go. I think I need to burn some stuff, kind of ashes to rebirth, done with the old on with the new.

I slept pretty well last night thought I suspect it will take a couple of days to catch up. I will head home tonight and begin the chore of the second separation of goods (keep or sell).

Wish me luck.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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