More less than pleasant news, it seems the savings I had hoped would last six months (perhaps eight if I worked while looking for a job) has dwindled faster than expected. Between my credit card bills and my car insurance and car payment I have only one month left. This means I am forced to take another job. Tomorrow I will head out in the morning to see if I can get another waiting job at night. That would give me a better bang for my buck if it�s a decent restaurant than my other option. Plan B would involve accepting one of the low paying forty hour a week afternoon shifts. Less than potential wait staff earnings but steady, sure. I�m only getting 30 hours at the restaurant and it works out to a little over $14 an hour which isn�t bad but it isn�t good either. I figure I need another 800 to 1000 a month to meet all the bills, pay for my medication and recreate a cushion slowly but surely. That means that $250 a week will do it. Accounting for the taxman (and he takes a huge bite out of my no dependent paycheck) I need to gross at least $360 which means I can do it at 9 an hour. Waiting would be better (and I should make at least 100 a night) but it�s so flaky and it�s summer (picnics and all) and I�m afraid I will run out of money and then what?

It�s times like this when the gravity of what I did hits me. I feel pressed to the ground with it. Walking away from a great job to land back here, broke and struggling. My chest hurts.

I have left messages with all the staffing firms I already registered with and I could start Thursday at a job paying $9.30 but it starts a 3 pm and that throws a monkey wrench into the restaurant job. I have to have both so I might have to turn it down and hope one of the other firms comes through.

I need something now, damn it.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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