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2006-05-25 - 12:56 p.m.

I went for a run yesterday. After driving all over doing errands on my day off I came home, put on the running clothes and far too new looking year old running shoes and went for a run. A whole mile. My Darling was unimpressed. I, however, was thrilled for two reasons. Under normal conditions when returning to the road after a winter hiatus (and this was much, much longer thanks to my broken wrist) even having run on a treadmill (which I haven�t done since I left Sunny CA) I am usually forced to walk even in the first mile, at least for the first week. I am proud to say that I ran, the whole mile. Maybe the waitress job and subsequent running around has help get me closer to running shape than the treadmill could. I am continuing to resist the scale that sits there, in my bathroom, staring at me. I am not a child however, so I will not request it be hidden, even by me. I will conquer this obsession.

I�m having less success on the eating front. I will not be surprised at the lack of weight loss I will see when I do finally step up on my shiny new scale this Saturday morning. I have been very bad. It�s the chocolate (yesterday I succumbed to white coconut chocolate, WHITE COCONUT I tell you!). Oh and I have that unfortunate job which interferes with appropriate eating. Something you should be aware of the next time you head out to eat at your favorite restaurant. Your cook will get a break (ten minutes after two hours and lunch if the shift is to exceed 5 hours, unpaid of course), your busboy will receive the same. Of course Management will take breaks as they see fit but your waitress can work up to eight hours with no break and no lunch. I work from 8 until 3 on Sunday with no break and I am not allowed to eat on the clock. All the girls sneak food (wouldn�t you?) but you can�t eat healthy on the run so you are usually forced into eating biscuits, banana bread and other cast off unservables, not exactly the best for those of us trying to drop a few pounds. Thus I abstain until I get home, by then it�s four o�clock. This is too early to eat dinner if I wish to dine with My Darling since he may or may not be up by then and when he does get up he�s not prepared to eat. I have a choice, I can a) snack when I get home on something healthy, satisfying but not filling enough to ruin my dinner (this is when the chocolate begins calling) or b) stick it out and wait a couple more hours to eat. I�ve been good abut eating before work (a little protein, yogurt or egg, a little carb, bisquit or cereal) but when I get home I�m on the horns of my dilemma.

Let�s not forget the after dinner, My Darling�s gone off to work and I don�t know what to do with myself eating. I may have that one licked though. Last night wasn�t great (White Coconut Chocolate!!) but three days ago I came home to find My Darlings computer desk (now my computer desk) set up in the spare room (many more steps away from the kitchen than the dining room table which has been the home of my computer since we arrived here in the middle of nowhere (once again, not sure what I was thinking)). I spent that evening setting up my computer desk and exploring the boxes of books and such that have sat neglected in the corner of the spare room while we waited for sufficient funds to provide shelves to accommodate our shared collection. (Possible solution on that front, see below) Two days ago I spent the evening coloring. I am a colored pencil enthusiast and enjoy coloring in black and white drawings made by other artists. It is artistic expression for the limited talent. It is also a great time filler. Before you start, I know writing fills time nicely as well but lately when I sit down to write in the evenings I become quite depressed and morose (It�s cause I�m HUNGRY�). I think I�m safer getting lost in color for now.

Now, as to the book shelves, over the weekend I met with My Darling�s sister�s husband (here fore to be referred to as Woodman) and with Sis�s help we built window blackout screens I designed to assist My Darling in sleeping during the daylight hours. I am quite pleased with the outcome. Woodman loves working with wood and building furniture (the guy has a professional vacuum air exhaust system installed in his garage for goodness sake). He is an engineer by profession but for fun he builds beautiful pieces of furniture. During the course of the building of the screens he shared that he had no projects, his house was full, and he was happy to have something to do. I asked if he was serious and let him know that I was in the market for bookshelves if he was willing to build them. SCORE! All we have to do is design them and buy the wood. I�m getting bookshelves man.

The job scene continues to bear no fruit. I heard back from another recruiter who says the client wants some experience I don�t have and a different geographic location. I can�t even score temp work. The waitress thing isn�t garnering near enough money to live on and my stores are diminishing. I�ve still got several months left before I have to panic but it�s not doing a lot for my mental health. Speaking of my mental health, I�m having difficulty not crying in public. Silly things like when the thrift store yesterday allowed me to leave an item with them for my purchase while I looked around the store and then sold it to someone else (Oops, sorry) sent me to my car in tears. I come close at work when things get hairy too. Not like me I assure you. I have decided that I must apply for the horrible health insurance provided by my work ($500 deductible before they pay anything and $5,000 cap on benefits) just so I can fill the gap and avoid pre-existing condition limitations.

CRAP!! I just burned the carrots I was cooking up to leave in the fridge for munching, lost in writing and I just plain forgot they were on the stove. It�s that kind of negligence that scares My Darling (�you�ll burn the house down already�) and he isn�t wrong. I just can�t seem to do any better. New rule, no writing and cooking at the same time.

*Sigh*

Anyhow, that�s all that�s fit to print right now.

Watch this space for details on run #2.

I wish you Peace

~alison~


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