I posted last night, late last night and when I read the post this morning even I was disgusted at the whininess. My frustration level has peaked and I think I am coming down for the moment. I wonderful friend of mine is going through really troubling times with her daughter and it made me see how self pitying I was being. Thus last nights post is gone (if you read it ignore it, if you missed it you didn�t miss anything trust me).

I just realized that I never let on that the article in LHJ was out. My dear Sandi and I were featured in a little segment courtesy of the ALA whose program was responsible for my soon to be three year quit (June 3) which I agreed to for the publicity it would generate for the program there. That program saves lives and if you want to quit smoking you can get there from here. It�s kinda weird knowing that you are in a national magazine for all the world to see. I wonder if my ex will hear of it? While it isn�t his sort of reading material he does have family who might find it. Isn�t it strange how we can�t stop thinking about times in our life that are over and done with. I still find myself mentally reviewing events that have long passed and should be of no concern to my current life. Of course in my defense, those who do not examine history are destined to repeat it. I don�t want to repeat my mistakes. It seems as though that is the main sticking point between my Darling and I. I can�t seem to do certain things consistently. I am in capable of drinking coffee without spilling it on the counter somewhere and no matter how I wipe it down there is always some spot remaining to irritate my Darling. It is frustrating to me because I try to pay attention to such things but for some reason unbeknownst to me I can�t seem to accomplish this.

While I was working on this post I received a call from a recruiter. He was hired to provide candidates for a field service position for an instrument manufacturer (scientific instruments). I don�t have all the experience they are looking for (I never do) but I have a varied enough background for what they need and it would be a great job for me. No heavy lifting, lots of troubleshooting and customer service for a young and exciting new field. Not to get my hopes up but the call came on my home phone (he misdialed my cell and thought it didn�t work) and I just happened to be home today. If I believed in fate I might be encouraged by that. Of course I�m more a random chance kinda girl so it�s probably nothing. We shall see. I need someone to at least be interested, I�m starting to think no one cares.

Send me some love (and cross your fingers).

I�m hoping today will bring my new scale (I want to know how much I weigh). I weighed myself at the clinic yesterday but I�m not sure I believe it so I�m waiting patiently (OK impatiently) for the scale so I can see for sure what the damage is. It has been over a year since I could be as active as I like to be which has take a toll on my aging figure and while I don�t have any desire to try for Hot Mama I would like to fit more comfortably into my clothing and perhaps rescue a few of the pants that no longer fit from the �I hope someday to fit into these again� bin.
Wow it�s gotten late, I gotta go and do something (anything) so I don�t feel as though I wasted the day away.

I wish you Peace

~alison~

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